At this point the other attendee of the stand pipped up. She was a young lady, without a gram of fat on her, and bore a remarkable resemblance to a blackberry bush. “Look here, do you need to see the medic? Your legs look quite bad. And you look pretty pale. And that gash on your shoulder likes like it … Read More
Forecast was promising, so inevitably it lashed with rain start to finish. I learnt a lesson from last time round: get to the start line early, these things kick off early. I failed to learn the lesson and started at the back of the pen. The Marshall gave a little speech and laughed heartily about how pleased he was that … Read More
Mud run 2022 – Notes from an escaped mental patient. Structure: Checkpoint race. Find the marker (pasty) on the map. Note the number on the marker. Move on. 2:15pm start. Reconvene at 4pm at Gramps’ Hill to receive new instructions. Back at the finish point at 5. Remember headtorch. Start line “Sorry, he’s done what!? He’s slashed his right cornea … Read More
Abingdon Crit with Abingdon Race Team Eddie Wetbeak goes to the races under the Team Zero Allez banner, with fellow Walruses Bill and Jonny. Thanks to the Abingdon Race Team. Joining the army I’ve come to the conclusion that driving to an event is the best bit. Getting on the road at 6:30am, sunrise, clear roads, no child to rear … Read More
“Courir la nuit, ça n’a rien à voir” The Monts du Lyonnais have a special place in my heart. I’ve been heading back for the infamous Saintélyon on and off since 2008. This year was possibly my 6th edition and I think it was up there as the best edition to date! For the uninitiated – the Saintélyon is a … Read More
So I did a thing. The ‘thing’ was The Salomon Ring of Steall Skyrace. I wasn’t totally sure what a “Skyrace” was, but it sounded cool. You can find the website here. The Salomon Ring of Steall Skyrace follows in the tradition of skyrunning, which consists of uncompromising mountain running, such as scrambling along mountain ridges with steep ascents, traverses … Read More
Dawn broke on an auspicious September morning and a rag tag gang gathered in a field in Oxfordshire with many a question in their heads – How did it come to this? Did I pack my helmet? How did that van get there? (and how’s it going to get out again?) But George’s parking predicaments was not yet the main … Read More
Some Walruses took on the Outlaw Half Holkham – self titled as THE UK’S MOST BEAUTIFUL TRIATHLON. Find out here how they got on. *The beginning* First there was Bizzle. He wanted to prove he wasn’t just a swim and run guy. He wanted to ensure that all those hours of 5am cycling in Watopia over the winter with … Read More
“Just recount in your own words, to the best of your recollection, what happened” I say. “I know it’s been a while. I won’t interrupt unless I feel a clarification for those reading might be useful.” I offer those words to the shape on the screen and sit back. I’m sat in my office, brightly lit with the late afternoon … Read More
Week 6 – Finale Race. So it’s the day after the night before and the reality that the Sexy Walrus E-racing league has to come it’s final conclusion has not yet fully sunk it. Over the past week tensions were running high in Dixleton Scott, rumours abound that due to a no-show on the start line G.Dix would be stood … Read More
What possesses a man to quit their job, relinquish their possessions, file for divorce and publicly renounce their children? The answer to that question, in the case of Alan Davies, is Zwift. Piecing together exactly what happened on that fateful Friday in March is like wedging together multiple seemingly unrelated objects to create an abstract masterpiece. On its own, each … Read More
Week 4. It’s Tuesday morning. The day after, the day after the end of a weekend of complete mayhem. I’m just thinking to myself it’s been nice to have 24hours of walrus media respite. “Pinggg”….a notification from the “team leaders” WhatsApp group…George Dix (who else?): ‘are we JUST jumping onto a Zwift race this week?’ And so it begins. There’s … Read More
Week 1 – 24k ride with a couple of hills Author – Ed For those that weren’t there. This is – I think – what happened. But thinking about it, I’m not really sure it is. 3 laps of a 8k circuit. 18 walruses ready to go. Countdown ticks down. 3, 2, 1 and we’re off. As usual and for … Read More
The Stonor Park Maverick Half Marathon 21km from the point of view of James Whittington. A race report. (James is a strange fellow, much of the following is quite clearly untrue – Ed.)
My name is Tony Maguire and I run an investment platform for the sale and resale of indigenous artwork. You can find out more about me at www.cashforculture.com
A race review – by Rob France: A gruelling 47 mile foot race along the Thames Path from Oxford to Henley. On foot. His feet. From Go Beyond Race Events. “What’s the point in all this?” “What’s the point in what?” “This. Why am I doing this?” “Don’t be silly, you’ll enjoy it once you get going”. Into the darkness … Read More
The run up to the event had been filled with nervous anticipation and debate. Would Teo’s now legendary FTP and Zwift experience make him unstoppable out there on the tarmac? Would the whole event be rained off? How many bananas should one carry? Was Matt on the list already and therefore unable to take Ben’s spot? Would Goerge Dix make … Read More
Keir Crabhands recounts a tale of mostly woe to the rest of the Walrus herd, on the subject of the SwimRun 2020.
A Wednesday night. Hot. Sultry. A local club TT. I warmed up the legs on the short spin down to the start feeling strong and wondering what my chances were of a good result. Maybe even a podium.
The Walrus Triathlon expert team explores whether triathlon training is acceptable during the COVID-19 crisis, and how to train if so. (Note that all thoughts and ideas are purely for discussion and not to be acted upon)
The line of tired, struggling bodies stretches a kilometer ahead of me across the shining sillion. I can see them all – monsters, pigs, seals – scattered at intervals, all slowed to a toiling plod, seemingly unmoving in the landscape.
And so I returned to Copenhagen. A city of beautiful bikes and equally beautiful men and women. Many of them somewhere on the spectrum between teak and dark mahogany.
An unusual tale of some Walrus who attempted the St Albans Half Marathon, mostly consisting of how they warmed up and finishing with a poem.
I did what everyone else does, blindly sign up for something in the middle future to give a purpose to my meandering running and general fitness efforts. That something was the Maverick Buckinghamshire half marathon. An off road, hilly affair, with the difficulty rating of 2 on the rather snazzy Maverick website.
SW Team Captain Eddie Wetbeak reviews the pinnacle of the Walrus calendar: The Walrus Tri.
I found myself alone. The streets of London dark and still. Shaking, weary and astonished that only a mere 8kms into our journey my cycling companion and I were already split. Dave Kerr had forgotten an essential item that would not only enhance his overall cycling style, but be necessary to combat the sun rays we were bound to bask … Read More
It was three o clock in the morning when I heard the ominous creak of floorboards from the downstairs living room.
My overwhelming feeling, standing there, was furious resentment. He had tricked me. I could have been comfortably ensconced on my sofa watching back episodes of Escape to the Chateau. And here I was, in the mizzling damp, about to spend half an hour suffering in my own personal hell….
An in-depth review of the finest season-ending triathlon known to humankind: The Walrus Run.
